While I was surfing the blogosphere I came across the blog entitled "Believe" by a lovely woman named Michelle at http://shrimpsey.blogspot.com. She was blogging about her experiences incorporating "The Secret" and the Law of Attraction into her life. Check it out.
At the beginning of her blog was a youtube clip of Napoleon Hill discussing the power of your mind in creating the life you want. I found it so fascinating I felt compelled to share it as I continue to watch his other clips on my own. It is too easy to feel powerless to change one's circumstances in life. I am determined to use as many means at my disposal to create the life of my dreams. I hope all of you are willing to do the same to live life on your own terms. I hope you find this clip motivating enough to help you move forward in any direction you choose. (I also like the trip back in time we get to take, while listening to Napoleon Hill speak in his own words about something he is passionate about.) Enjoy!
Friday, April 30, 2010
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Journey to the Center of... the Kabbalah.
So I spent most of Saturday at the Los Angeles Book Fair, with a friend, soaking up words of wisdom from James Ellroy who gave a fantastic lecture on his process and his life as a novelist. That man is nuts, but very entertaining.
As I made my way through the crowded booths on the UCLA campus I came across the tent of a local Kabbalah Learning Center. As the lady spoke to me, I realized I knew absolutely nothing about Kabbalah except that it was something MaddonnA was into and had some connection with Hebrew Mysticism. I took home their free dvd and while it intrigued me, it said a lot without saying anything at all. I went to their website and found myself with that same feeling. I felt like I was drinking water but couldn't quench my thirst. Strangely, the fact that I couldn't get clarity on what Kabbalah was made it more interesting to find out.
With the help of Google, I found myself at the Bnei Baruch Kabbalah Learning Center, based in NYC where they were offering a 10 week free course in the Fundamentals of Kabbalah. It is a live on-line class taught two days a week, Sundays by an instructor in NY and Wednesdays by an instructor in Israel. I seemed to have registered just before the April 28th deadline. Students from around the world are following along and able to send in questions regarding the day's subject matter. It is a path toward spiritual growth that takes some time to comprehend. I have absolutely no idea why I am filled with a desire to understand what Kabbalah is all about but I am hooked. I may need a few weeks of study before I can even articulate if this path of spiritual study is something I want to incorporate into my life. However, for now, the desire is strong just to understand the concept.
I love that fate has guided me to this fascinating new subplot to the epic adventure I call my life. The mystery of the unknown with the promise of profound transformation seems like something I just can't miss. I believe everything happens for a reason. I look forward to discovering why I am walking on this particular path at this time. Here's to enjoying the journey!
(Below is a youtube clip I found that was created by the folks at the Bnei Baruch Learning Center regarding a poem written about the Tree of Life.)
As I made my way through the crowded booths on the UCLA campus I came across the tent of a local Kabbalah Learning Center. As the lady spoke to me, I realized I knew absolutely nothing about Kabbalah except that it was something MaddonnA was into and had some connection with Hebrew Mysticism. I took home their free dvd and while it intrigued me, it said a lot without saying anything at all. I went to their website and found myself with that same feeling. I felt like I was drinking water but couldn't quench my thirst. Strangely, the fact that I couldn't get clarity on what Kabbalah was made it more interesting to find out.
With the help of Google, I found myself at the Bnei Baruch Kabbalah Learning Center, based in NYC where they were offering a 10 week free course in the Fundamentals of Kabbalah. It is a live on-line class taught two days a week, Sundays by an instructor in NY and Wednesdays by an instructor in Israel. I seemed to have registered just before the April 28th deadline. Students from around the world are following along and able to send in questions regarding the day's subject matter. It is a path toward spiritual growth that takes some time to comprehend. I have absolutely no idea why I am filled with a desire to understand what Kabbalah is all about but I am hooked. I may need a few weeks of study before I can even articulate if this path of spiritual study is something I want to incorporate into my life. However, for now, the desire is strong just to understand the concept.
I love that fate has guided me to this fascinating new subplot to the epic adventure I call my life. The mystery of the unknown with the promise of profound transformation seems like something I just can't miss. I believe everything happens for a reason. I look forward to discovering why I am walking on this particular path at this time. Here's to enjoying the journey!
(Below is a youtube clip I found that was created by the folks at the Bnei Baruch Learning Center regarding a poem written about the Tree of Life.)
Friday, April 23, 2010
Inspiration from Unlikely Places
Hey, folks! I hope life is all you want it to be! If not, it is never too late to make a change. I am facing life and its many challenges head on with as much HOPE and OPTIMISM as possible, trusting the Universe will guide me on my "leap of faith" journey. Hold a good thought for me.
Along my hero's journey, I found inspiration from the unlikeliest of places... a email chain letter. Actually, it was sent by a friend with beautiful pics and mantras from the Dalai Lama that I found inspiring and feel the urge to share with you all. They really spoke to me and where I am in my life, which is why I guess I was open to hearing them at this time.
"Take into account that GREAT LOVE and GREAT ACHIEVEMENT involve GREAT RISK."
Wow, in both areas, I see, in retrospect, how true this is. I think for myself the challenge is to make this a present reality in my journey from now on.
"When you lose, don't lose the lesson..."
Here is where I am starting to make some progress. It takes some real perspective changing on my part to move from sinking into depression over a loss as opposed to asking myself what is the lesson to be learned from this situation, but I am progressing on this front with great benefit from the endeavor.
"Follow the three R's: Respect for Self, Respect for Others and Responsibility for All your Actions."
This has been my most current revelation lately. I am discovering as I really examine my actions, just how much I have been operating out of a lack of respect for myself and lack of willingness to take responsibility for ALL of my actions. Sometimes it is just too easy to want to blame someone else but taking responsibility is what has allowed me to see how certain actions came from that place of lack of respect for self, giving me an opportunity to make better choices as I move forward.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck."
I recently pulled out an old Garth Brooks cd that was a favorite of my late partner Johnny. Man, it is amazing how music has the power to evoke emotions and take you vividly back times in your life that you associate with a song. Anyway, there is a song called "Unanswered Prayers" that dramatizes this sentiment quite poetically. Check it out. (Found this clip on YouTube. The only one I could find with Garth Brooks singing and not one of his many fans paying tribute.)
"Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly."
"Don't let a little dispute injure a great relationship."
I have embraced this one completely. Sometimes a dispute can seem so life changingly important at the time, but in the end, if you really care about the person more than your need to be "right", you'll be able to agree to disagree and value what matters most. Not always easy to do.
"When you realize you've made mistake, take immediate steps to correct it."
This took some maturity on my part but now it feels like the only way to be able to move forward without getting bogged with regrets.
"Spend some time alone everyday."
I had to realize that this means turning off the television as company and spend some time with my own thoughts. It has been a revelation how peaceful and productive life can be with less television and more quiet time.
"Open your arms to change, but don't give up your values."
Boy, has this been the lesson of all lessons for me when it comes to relationships. I discovered a while back that I often, unconsciously trnasformed myself into the person I thought my partner wanted in the self-delusion of being open to change rather than being myself. Eventually who I really was woke up and said "What the hell are you doing? Be yourself!
"Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer."
"..."
"Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and look back, you'll enjoy it a second time."
Everyone has regrets, I suppose. I hope to incorporate this into my consciousness more and more. I think I am a good person yet as I take more responsibility for my actions I see that it is all a growth process and a shedding of self-delusion of what rationalizations we create to see ourselves as justified by our sometimes questionable actions. Even if they are only questionable in our own minds, it is better to live as free of rationalization as possible.
"A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life."
I woke up last week with an urge to set up a "space" for mediation I drove to Target and found a beautiful little dark wooden end table and inspirational plaques. I set it up in my living room. Suddenly I noticed just how bare and functional my living room appeared. Later I went to Ikea and bought a coffee table and side table that matched my meditation area. Suddenly after many many years in my apartment, my apartment felt like my home with a warmth and comfort I always felt was missing. Now I am ready to continue the transformation with a new paint job.
"In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past."
"Share your knowledge. It is a way of achieving immortality."
This is the joy I get from coaching other actors. Regardless of where my career is currently, there is something fun and rewarding in sharing my knowledge of the subject i am most passionate about.
"Be gentle with the Earth."
Everyone is going GREEN these days. I often find the gentler I am with myself the more natural it is to be gentle with the Earth.
"Once a year, go some place you've never been before."
This is one I look forward to incorporating. I use to think it had to be someplace grand. While I still want to see Paris sometime next year, I realized, Hey, I live in Los Angeles!! There are so many places I have yet to explore! Adventure is available anywhere.
"Remember the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other."
Love has often been mistaken for need. Again for myself, learning to love and respect myself more is the key to unlocking so much opportunitie for growth. The more I am okay with myself the less I need approval or love from others. Hence, the love I do receive is appreciated for exactly what it is.
" Judge success by what you had to give up in order to get it."
Another rude awakening came up for me regarding this one. I have come to see that my success or lack thereof has much to do with the proportion with which I am willing to give up my fear and do the work needed to be done in my day-to -day not from a place of fear but of confidence. The more I work from this "mental space" the more productive i am and less likely to waste time in tv vegetation and mindless busy-work. I am now embarking on spending more time reading up on acting techniques I was not exposed to in grad school and embracing more creative tools so I am more prepared and confident than ever before. When I was still at my old 9to5 preparing for my departure, situations manifested seemingly out of nowhere to help me in my move toward my dreams. I see now because I was working toward my goals with a focus and confidence that fed upon itself . Now I must do the same now that I am living my dream I have to actually LIVE it and stay in that place of "knowing" faith and confidence.
"Approach love and cooking with abandon."
I am jumping of the edge here and letting the Universe catch me!! I have forgotten what is like to love with abandon but with a little Garth Brooks and blind faith, the memory with come back and hopefully a new love as well.
Along my hero's journey, I found inspiration from the unlikeliest of places... a email chain letter. Actually, it was sent by a friend with beautiful pics and mantras from the Dalai Lama that I found inspiring and feel the urge to share with you all. They really spoke to me and where I am in my life, which is why I guess I was open to hearing them at this time.
"Take into account that GREAT LOVE and GREAT ACHIEVEMENT involve GREAT RISK."
Wow, in both areas, I see, in retrospect, how true this is. I think for myself the challenge is to make this a present reality in my journey from now on.
"When you lose, don't lose the lesson..."
Here is where I am starting to make some progress. It takes some real perspective changing on my part to move from sinking into depression over a loss as opposed to asking myself what is the lesson to be learned from this situation, but I am progressing on this front with great benefit from the endeavor.
"Follow the three R's: Respect for Self, Respect for Others and Responsibility for All your Actions."
This has been my most current revelation lately. I am discovering as I really examine my actions, just how much I have been operating out of a lack of respect for myself and lack of willingness to take responsibility for ALL of my actions. Sometimes it is just too easy to want to blame someone else but taking responsibility is what has allowed me to see how certain actions came from that place of lack of respect for self, giving me an opportunity to make better choices as I move forward.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck."
I recently pulled out an old Garth Brooks cd that was a favorite of my late partner Johnny. Man, it is amazing how music has the power to evoke emotions and take you vividly back times in your life that you associate with a song. Anyway, there is a song called "Unanswered Prayers" that dramatizes this sentiment quite poetically. Check it out. (Found this clip on YouTube. The only one I could find with Garth Brooks singing and not one of his many fans paying tribute.)
"Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly."
"Don't let a little dispute injure a great relationship."
I have embraced this one completely. Sometimes a dispute can seem so life changingly important at the time, but in the end, if you really care about the person more than your need to be "right", you'll be able to agree to disagree and value what matters most. Not always easy to do.
"When you realize you've made mistake, take immediate steps to correct it."
This took some maturity on my part but now it feels like the only way to be able to move forward without getting bogged with regrets.
"Spend some time alone everyday."
I had to realize that this means turning off the television as company and spend some time with my own thoughts. It has been a revelation how peaceful and productive life can be with less television and more quiet time.
"Open your arms to change, but don't give up your values."
Boy, has this been the lesson of all lessons for me when it comes to relationships. I discovered a while back that I often, unconsciously trnasformed myself into the person I thought my partner wanted in the self-delusion of being open to change rather than being myself. Eventually who I really was woke up and said "What the hell are you doing? Be yourself!
"Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer."
"..."
"Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and look back, you'll enjoy it a second time."
Everyone has regrets, I suppose. I hope to incorporate this into my consciousness more and more. I think I am a good person yet as I take more responsibility for my actions I see that it is all a growth process and a shedding of self-delusion of what rationalizations we create to see ourselves as justified by our sometimes questionable actions. Even if they are only questionable in our own minds, it is better to live as free of rationalization as possible.
"A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life."
I woke up last week with an urge to set up a "space" for mediation I drove to Target and found a beautiful little dark wooden end table and inspirational plaques. I set it up in my living room. Suddenly I noticed just how bare and functional my living room appeared. Later I went to Ikea and bought a coffee table and side table that matched my meditation area. Suddenly after many many years in my apartment, my apartment felt like my home with a warmth and comfort I always felt was missing. Now I am ready to continue the transformation with a new paint job.
"In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past."
"Share your knowledge. It is a way of achieving immortality."
This is the joy I get from coaching other actors. Regardless of where my career is currently, there is something fun and rewarding in sharing my knowledge of the subject i am most passionate about.
"Be gentle with the Earth."
Everyone is going GREEN these days. I often find the gentler I am with myself the more natural it is to be gentle with the Earth.
"Once a year, go some place you've never been before."
This is one I look forward to incorporating. I use to think it had to be someplace grand. While I still want to see Paris sometime next year, I realized, Hey, I live in Los Angeles!! There are so many places I have yet to explore! Adventure is available anywhere.
"Remember the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other."
Love has often been mistaken for need. Again for myself, learning to love and respect myself more is the key to unlocking so much opportunitie for growth. The more I am okay with myself the less I need approval or love from others. Hence, the love I do receive is appreciated for exactly what it is.
" Judge success by what you had to give up in order to get it."
Another rude awakening came up for me regarding this one. I have come to see that my success or lack thereof has much to do with the proportion with which I am willing to give up my fear and do the work needed to be done in my day-to -day not from a place of fear but of confidence. The more I work from this "mental space" the more productive i am and less likely to waste time in tv vegetation and mindless busy-work. I am now embarking on spending more time reading up on acting techniques I was not exposed to in grad school and embracing more creative tools so I am more prepared and confident than ever before. When I was still at my old 9to5 preparing for my departure, situations manifested seemingly out of nowhere to help me in my move toward my dreams. I see now because I was working toward my goals with a focus and confidence that fed upon itself . Now I must do the same now that I am living my dream I have to actually LIVE it and stay in that place of "knowing" faith and confidence.
"Approach love and cooking with abandon."
I am jumping of the edge here and letting the Universe catch me!! I have forgotten what is like to love with abandon but with a little Garth Brooks and blind faith, the memory with come back and hopefully a new love as well.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Change Your Thoughts
Well, I am a week into keeping my thoughts focused on the positive. While I cannot say I have seen wonderous miracles abound, I can say I have dropped a tremendous amount of stress from my day-to-day life. I found that I have conditioned my first reaction to events to be negative and with it came a slow accumulation of stress. I will confess it is not easy making the shift but it is so much more enjoyable looking at life with a bit of hope as opposed to pessimism.
Sunday, I started back my Sunday runs in Griffith park with my training partner. Even though she got sick right before the LA Marathon, she has decided to keep running with me on Sundays. Our first post-marathon run was terrific. We took it easy and had an amazing conversation about life.
Started nightly meditation this week which has been great for clearing my head of stress before bed. Eventually I would like to start my day with a morning meditation to set the stage for my day.
Today, I sent off my taxes. Always a fun adventure. One day I will do my taxes early but there is something about being apart of the last minute frenzied energy of the April 15th deadline I find enjoyable, haha!
I will say the best benefit to this focus on the positive is in my acting. My performances in my acting class have been fantastic. I hae been giving myself permission to jump off the edge and have fun and I have felt my confidence, and the quality of my work has been improving. When you step out of your own way, there is no telling what creative impulses will be unleashed.
Looking forward to what lies ahead.
Sunday, I started back my Sunday runs in Griffith park with my training partner. Even though she got sick right before the LA Marathon, she has decided to keep running with me on Sundays. Our first post-marathon run was terrific. We took it easy and had an amazing conversation about life.
Started nightly meditation this week which has been great for clearing my head of stress before bed. Eventually I would like to start my day with a morning meditation to set the stage for my day.
Today, I sent off my taxes. Always a fun adventure. One day I will do my taxes early but there is something about being apart of the last minute frenzied energy of the April 15th deadline I find enjoyable, haha!
I will say the best benefit to this focus on the positive is in my acting. My performances in my acting class have been fantastic. I hae been giving myself permission to jump off the edge and have fun and I have felt my confidence, and the quality of my work has been improving. When you step out of your own way, there is no telling what creative impulses will be unleashed.
Looking forward to what lies ahead.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Your Life As Inspiration
I saw this video on the blogsite of znge92 (http://znge.blogspot.com), who I found on blogcatologue. The clip really fit with where my thoughts are and musically inspired me to move forward in the direction of my dreams.
Quotes of Confidence
In search of inspiration, I found some quotes that put me in the right frame of mind.
I am not a has-been. I am a will be.
~Lauren Bacall
It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes.
~Sally Field
A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her.
~David Brinkley
Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price.
~Author Unknown
Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.
~Peter T. Mcintyre
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.
~Anaïs Nin, Diary, 1969
Argue for your limitations and, sure enough, they're yours.
~Richard Bach, Illusions
You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.
~Michael Jordan
It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.
~Edmund Hillary
Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.
~Mark Twain
Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance.
~Bruce Barton
A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort.
~Sydney Smith
Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway.
~Mary Kay Ash
Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy. ~Norman Vincent Peale
Always act like you're wearing an invisible crown.
~Author Unknown
The courage to be is the courage to accept oneself, in spite of being unacceptable.
~Paul Tillich
Of all our infirmities, the most savage is to despise our being.
~Michel de Montaigne
People are crying up the rich and variegated plumage of the peacock, and he is himself blushing at the sight of his ugly feet.
~Sa'Di
It's hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head.
~Sally Kempton, Esquire, 1970
When the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, it may be that they take better care of it there.
~Cecil Selig
Other people's opinion of you does not have to become your reality.
~Les Brown
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy who'll decide where to go.
~Dr. Seuss
Confidence is preparation. Everything else is beyond your control.
~Richard Kline
I am not a has-been. I am a will be.
~Lauren Bacall
It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes.
~Sally Field
A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her.
~David Brinkley
Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price.
~Author Unknown
Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.
~Peter T. Mcintyre
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.
~Anaïs Nin, Diary, 1969
Argue for your limitations and, sure enough, they're yours.
~Richard Bach, Illusions
You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.
~Michael Jordan
It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.
~Edmund Hillary
Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.
~Mark Twain
Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance.
~Bruce Barton
A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort.
~Sydney Smith
Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway.
~Mary Kay Ash
Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy. ~Norman Vincent Peale
Always act like you're wearing an invisible crown.
~Author Unknown
The courage to be is the courage to accept oneself, in spite of being unacceptable.
~Paul Tillich
Of all our infirmities, the most savage is to despise our being.
~Michel de Montaigne
People are crying up the rich and variegated plumage of the peacock, and he is himself blushing at the sight of his ugly feet.
~Sa'Di
It's hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head.
~Sally Kempton, Esquire, 1970
When the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, it may be that they take better care of it there.
~Cecil Selig
Other people's opinion of you does not have to become your reality.
~Les Brown
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy who'll decide where to go.
~Dr. Seuss
Confidence is preparation. Everything else is beyond your control.
~Richard Kline
Leap of Faith or Spiritual Madness?
I am finding myself at what I could only describe as a spiritual wall. I believe that when you do what you love the money will flow. I also believe that your life is a reflection of where you place your thoughts. I guess my challenge is I love acting but in my leap of faith back to acting professionally last year has me more focused on getting work than enjoying acting.
Translation? As much as I know I have talent as an actor, the business of acting has its own set of fears. There is a degree of confidence required to go back into a field focused on the twenty-something set. I look younger than my age but bloody hell, I do not look like a twenty year old! I am thankfully, getting into my groove with the whole audition thing. It, unfortunately, has taken me a year to get to that place again where I just feel relazed in front of the camera. Now the real work begins. So my question is, has my lack of confidence and the obvious fear-related thoughts been the major factor in my not landing professional work over the past year? The fact is while I did not book any work, I did come close but close is not booking a job. However, I have been doing a good bit of coaching where my confidence and ability has never been a question for me.
When I think of the concept of trusting the Universe, occasionally, it feels like I am kidding myself. Yet it also makes complete sense to me. My lack of faith usually comes up when I worry about finances. It's like a clash of reality with spirituality if that makes sense. When things work, I see the positive thought/manifestation correlation. When things don't work, I also see the negative thought/manifestation correlation. The challenge is I just don't know how to feel that sense of confidence and positive thinking needed when my thoughts are drifting to that "fear" place.
Translation? As much as I know I have talent as an actor, the business of acting has its own set of fears. There is a degree of confidence required to go back into a field focused on the twenty-something set. I look younger than my age but bloody hell, I do not look like a twenty year old! I am thankfully, getting into my groove with the whole audition thing. It, unfortunately, has taken me a year to get to that place again where I just feel relazed in front of the camera. Now the real work begins. So my question is, has my lack of confidence and the obvious fear-related thoughts been the major factor in my not landing professional work over the past year? The fact is while I did not book any work, I did come close but close is not booking a job. However, I have been doing a good bit of coaching where my confidence and ability has never been a question for me.
So, as my finances are dripping away, how do I use my need to make money in my chosen field motivate me to increase my confidence and improve my performance during auditions? I refuse to give up on my dream! I know that I can succeed if I can get my thoughts in line with my dreams and not my fears. Now this may be what might be deemed spiritual madness- trusting the Universe to guide me in the direction of my thoughts.
I have no idea if I am making sense.
I just am searching for a way to feel realistic about my circumstances while remaining unshakeable in my faith that success is mine. I am going to try another leap of faith and start some experiments with rampaging on the positive and see if literally swimming in a sea of mental confidence positive visualizing will produce some literal bankable results.
Wish me luck.
Friday, April 2, 2010
A Look Back at 80's Television at Its Most Melodramatic Best!
In honor of John Forsythe's passing, here's a look back at Dynasty in its heyday. Now it seems a bit hokey, but at the time, this was truly groundbreaking television.
The gay storyline heats up in this clip.
What look back would be complete without a look at the Season 1 cliffhanger, with its discussion of homophobia and the introduction of the mysterious Alexis - the Bitch herself!
And last just for the hey of it, the opening credits with the delicious theme song of 80's decadence/materialism and the beginning of Season 2 with the entrance of Alexis! Enjoy.
The gay storyline heats up in this clip.
What look back would be complete without a look at the Season 1 cliffhanger, with its discussion of homophobia and the introduction of the mysterious Alexis - the Bitch herself!
And last just for the hey of it, the opening credits with the delicious theme song of 80's decadence/materialism and the beginning of Season 2 with the entrance of Alexis! Enjoy.
A Legend Passes...
Before I ever knew what gay was, I huddled in front of the t.v. set to watch the adventures of the mysterious Charlie and his angels. And while I loved watching the dasterdly deeds of Jr. on the CBS prime-time soap Dallas, there was something distinctively gay-friendly about ABC's Dynasty.
Hey, it was the 80's and the relative tolerance/acceptance of gays in society that is enjoyed today was barely in existence back then. Who'd think that the story of mega-wealthy father dealing poorly with a gay son and his lover would be groundbreaking stuff on network television but it was! For those of us in our teens grabbling with our sexual identity, there was something amazingly liberating seeing people like us depicted on television, especially if you had no peer in your own life to talk to.
Yeah, it may seem stupid in retrospect but at the time, Dynasty was such an escape for me from a reality that consisted of physical and mental harassment from neighborhood kids who knew I was different and enjoyed making me feel like a worthless nothing every chance they got.
Dynasty and the fabulous bitch that was Joan Collins a.k.a Alexis Carrington was the contemporary gay icon that Betty Davis was for generations before us. She empowered our inner bitch which allowed us to deal with the indignities and tragedies in our own lives with a sense of style and defiant sass. John Forsythe a.k.a. Blake Carrington was that flawed but loving parental figure who we all hoped would eventually accept us for who we were.
I know, I know, it was a prime-time soap opera for Christ sake! Yes, it was. Nevertheless, when you are living a life that feels so weighted with inevitable tragedy and the possible abandonment of everyone in your life you love if they discover who you really are, is it any wonder we would look to the magical world of televised make-believe for any strand of hope that we could survive the nightmare of the day-to-day? For me, I am grateful for Dynasty, John Forsythe and his fictional dysfunctional family for helping me get through the worst time of my young life.
The Magic of Music
In an effort to de-stress and let my April Fool's drama drift into the ether, I went to YouTube for a little distraction and came across this cool video, by someone called Thundralight, that helped me get centered once more. Enjoy!
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Thank God for Bally's!!
Sometimes people can be cruel under the guise of humor. I have a friend who works in my manager's office. Today he decided in the spirit of April Fool's day, he would call to congratulate me on booking the role I auditioned for for the upcoming film "Thor."
For one magical moment I was on Cloud 9! Next thing you know he informed me it was all just an April Fool's Day joke. I hung up and spent the afternoon in an amazing funk. Who takes the area where you are most vulnerable about and makes a joke out of it?
Thank God for Bally's because going to the gym and working out was the only thing capable of washing away the anger and frustration that seemed to take over. As I ran on the treadmill, I finally could just let go. When all else fails, the gym can work miracles!
Lesson learned? "Friends" can be toxic but they don't have to poison you if you don't allow them. It is up to you to choose how you react to what life throws at you, no matter how much it may blindside you.
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